Father, Mothers, Single Mothers

I Am Not A Father

Yes, I am a single mother who chose to raise my children alone instead of with a partner that express his lack of interest in having a monogamist relationship.  I chose me over a life filled with having to share a man.  I didn’t want my children growing up thinking that was the way a family should be and fall into that trap.  I have made a choice to take a decrease in hours at a job that barely pays, just to be home before my kids arrive from school, in order to greet them at the door. I have done without, in order that they might have, I have made our front yard into a water park, our backyard into a mountain top filled with snow, while cheering them on as they race down on homemade sleds made out of cardboard boxes.  I have been their doctor, counselor, emotional punching bag, a shoulder to cry on, that mom that will fight a kid if you mess with mine, and willing to make a fool of myself just to see them smile.  I am cautious with who I date and with whom meets them because I want them to know things are done decently and in order.  We don’t just date, but we are in hopes of a life partner.

But with all that I have single handedly done, I am not a father. I can’t teach my children the things only a father can and I will never give myself credit for doing that which God created man to do.  I encourage my children to watch their grandfather, their uncles, and any good man we might know that they might know what a good man does.  I don’t want a salute for doing what I should do as a mother.  This is a special day for all the real MEN to be honored for doing what a father does and I will never accept the honor of being both the mother and father.  I am only a mother fulling my role and instilling the things in my children’s life that only a mother can.

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